MBTI: For all ENFP's
The time has come for the ENFP’s. If you know an ENFP or are graced to be friends with one, chances are that you can easily describe this type as the “people people”. You know you’re in the presence of an ENFP when you see an uncanny ability to make instant connections with whoever they come across. ENFP’s are friendly, intelligent, winsome, charming, and charismatic. No wonder this type loves to appear in marketing, sales, and anything that has to do with people. Lets take a look at the ENFP.
How are ENFP’s Wired?
Extraverted Intuition (Ne) = “Exploration” = Dominant Function/Daddy Driver
Introverted Feeler (Fi) = “Authenticity” = Secondary Function/Mommy Co-pilot
IntroveExtroverted Thinker (Te) = “Effectiveness” = Tertiary Function/Teenage Boy
Introverted Sensor (Si) = “Remembrance” = Inferior Function/Baby Girl
So what does this tell us about ENFP’s?
ENFP’s primary mode of taking in information is through their Extraverted Intuition or their “exploration”. Exploration asks the question, “what if” or “what can be”. ENFP’s love to live in a world of possibilities. They are avid learners when it comes to their exploration as they love to create new connections in their mind. ENFP’s are highly represented in “creative” functions.
The ENFP’s co-pilot “Authenticity” kicks in as its decision making faculty. Often times when making decisions, an ENFP is really asking the question “what feels right?”. They are trying to discover what feels real and authentic to them. This coupled with their vibrant extraverted desire to explore and get to know people makes them one the highest emotional intelligence types.
The teenage function for the ENFP is the Extraverted Thinker or what we call “effectiveness”. Having the maturity of a teenage function, often times their ability to think critically or without emotion is functional however is still weak compared to their other functions. ENFP’s are more than capable of taking the lead and getting things done, but often times this teenage function will show up as a stress marker. (More on that later)
Finally the ENFP’s baby function is what we call Introverted Sensing or “Remembrance”. Often times you will notice that ENFP’s are not fond of the day to day details. If we’re being honest, most ENFP’s get absolutely drained by it. As a baby function, often times ENFP’s thrive in ideation and communication however get absolutely depleted by “menial” day to day tasks. Does this sound familiar ENFP friends?
As always there is hope. Not just hope but there are breakthroughs in self-awareness that I believe can help us to become the highest version of ourselves. I personally love writing this blog because 4 out of 7 of my closest friends are ENFP’s. INFJ’s and ENFP’s are like mirror images of one another. (More on that in point #4)
So what do I want to say to all my ENFP’s
1. You are the LIFE OF THE PARTY and WE NEED YOU. ENFP’s more than any other type I have seen have the craziest ability to have 300 best friends. In their mind, they are being absolutely sincere. Their capacity and value for friendship is actually just THAT BIG. ENFP’s have the craziest ability to befriend a numerous amount of people and share genuine connection with each of them. But why? Well when you realize that their primary mode of living is to “explore” you realize that they love to meet new people. It gives life to them. But when coupled with their sense of “authenticity” they are genuinely able to explore these relationships and establish an immediate sense of connection.
Coaching Tip: Realize what your gift and contribution to the world is. Obviously you are not pigeonholed to just being a relational master, because you are so much more than just that. But recognize where your super powers are and realize that most people just aren’t wired this way. Be the connector that you are and connect the world for a positive outcome. We need you to do this.
2. You are the JACK OF ALL TRADES and the MASTER OF THAT. Yes its true that most ENFP’s have short focus spans. They love to explore and they don’t like to get bogged down on one thing. In a team or deadline setting this can be problematic when working with the ENFP because they can seem all over the place (lets just keep it 1000 you guys). However there is a HUGE INSIGHT that I want you to see about yourself. Many times ENFP’s will feel like they are a jack of all trades, but have very little MASTERY over one thing. However the point that I want to make to you is that your ability to learn many things is actually your MASTERY. More than ever before the world is not seeking more Information but Connection. In essence people are looking for how information makes sense. When ENFP’s can find a strong sense of vision and purpose in their life, their ability to pull in people, resources, learning, and etc is unlike any other. Realize that your problem isn’t a lack of focus, but many times is a lack of purpose.
Coaching Tip: Make a practice of constantly recalibrating your purpose. Whether that is daily, weekly, monthly or just whenever you feel like you need it, create the time and space to calibrate yourself with a purpose that is bigger than yourself. As explorative feelers, you need this to be at your absolute best and function in health. Consider making a life statement or a quarterly goal calendar. Allow yourself to calibrate back to it over and over again.
3. You’re GREATEST GIFT can become YOUR GREATEST CURSE, but if you can learn how to REFINE IT, you will see your true GIFT UNLEASHED. Yes thats right, even your special powers of relational connectivity can become a curse if left unchecked. One consistent theme that I have seen come up over and over again with more than 10 ENFP’s that I have coached is the area of “people pleasing” or as some others would call it “the fear of man”. I’m gonna posit something to you for food for thought.
If ENFP’s have a high value for relational harmony, however also have a deep seated need for personal “authenticity” what happens when the two are at odds with one another or better yet are at complete compromise to each other? My greatest piece of advice to you is that this is where you feel the greatest level of dissonance in your life and left unchecked, you will become a shadow version of yourself.
The ENFP’s greatest gift to the world is their authentic love and connection. However when an ENFP is no longer functioning in genuine love or connection, this should be an alarm for RED ALERT. This may be the clear diagnostic indicator that something is amiss in your soul. This may be a clear clarion call that we’ve actually lost touch with what is true and real to us. We may have sacrificed the fire that kept us burning on the altar of “pleasing others” or even “success”. (More on this in #5)
Coaching Tip: If anything I just said struck a chord with you, I would really ask you to consider doing internal assessment. Consider starting by learning how to journal your “feelings” more than your "ideas”. Give yourself permission to write exactly how you feel as vulnerable and as authentic as it comes. Yes even feel free to drop some expletives if thats genuinely how you feel. This is one area that I will say the longer you can sit, the more fruitful it will be. Allow the heart to breathe and listen to the data that its trying to feed you. Ask yourself if you are being true to yourself. And if not, why?
4. Understanding your SHADOW FUNCTION. For ENFP’s your greatest area of ignorance is your Internal Intuition or “Perspectives”. Because of this, often times ENFP’s are brilliant in gauging how others are feeling and the relational energy in the room, but will often times feel like they are unable to go deep in drilling into one thing or even one area of development. This at times can cause the ENFP to feel somewhat “all over the place”. But again there is hope.
Coaching Tip: There is a lot of great synergy between INTJ’s/INFJ’s and ENFP’s. Many times you will see the two getting along because in many ways their energies can feed off of one another. Similiarly, because the Internal Intuition is a Shadow Function for the ENFP yet is a Dominant Function for the NJ types, find some people with this type to help you develop disciplines and habits to develop deeply. Often times when an ENFP can do this (sermon prepping, studies, project preparation) what comes out of them is insightfulness that flows like butter.
5. This area for the ENFP deserves another round of break down. Going back to the area of “people pleasing” or the “fear of man”. It’s important to recognize that the desire for “relational harmony” is actually a really good thing. However what happens when your desire for “relational harmony” is in direct conflict with your need for “authenticity”? Better yet, what happens when you’re in a POSITION OF LEADERSHIP and you know you will have to say and do things that won’t please everyone?
One of the greatest areas of growth for the ENFP is going to be knowing that you’re not going to please everyone and THATS OK. You’re greatest GROWTH HACK is going to be your ability to calibrate the right amount of CHALLENGE along with SUPPORT. Most ENFP’s will tend to lean heavier on the LOVE side over the TRUTH side. And thats natural because they have a strong desire for relational peace. However, when in leadership settings, their greatest area of growth will be the ability to CHALLENGE people WELL and stand for TRUTH no matter what the consequences may be.
When ENFP’s can calibrate this reality in their life well, I believe this is what allows them to be the INSPIRATIONAL LEADERS that we need.
Coaching Tip: Be the connector that you are, but don’t do so at the expense of losing what is true and real to you. Learn to create the right type of boundaries that allow you to stay connected with people yet allows you to be the leader that you are (leadership scenarios). Create a non-negotiable truth list. What are the boundaries that you are going to set for yourself emotionally and relationally. We won’t live by them to the T, but having a place of calibration will give you a reference point.
As always, hope this was helpful. My last thoughts for the ENFP again from the King of Pop himself.
“Heal the World, Make it a Better place”.
Andy